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  • Julia Martinez

Emotional child-parent separation

Today I would like to raise such a problem as the inability of emotional separation from the parents. Sadly it is a common situation where people are unhappy and don't know what to do with their feelings. People get stuck unable to live their life, following parent's scripts of life. Emotional child-parent separation happens around pre-teens ages when children start having their own interests, opinions, friendships and in general, disagree with parents. It is a natural phase and prepares them for adolescents. During that time, children are most interested in social life and less in family life. This process is a necessity for children and their parents. It is essential to realise that children are now young adults, they are allowed to make their own mistakes, have a different life, choose a partner and have a different path in life. Sometimes people get stuck in that phase and never really complete the separation. It is rather common. There might be various reasons for it. Often, it is a great love for a child and desire to give him/her a better life than the parents had. Sometimes it is the parent's fear of loneliness, and they keep their children very close never to feel alone. Sometimes it is a family drama and horror of losing someone very close. Could also be that parents and child/adult are stuck in their idea of a problematic childhood and can't believe that their child is capable of living independently. It is possible to separate from the parents even in adulthood; just this process doesn't happen immediately. It is feasible with hard work, patience and a strong desire to find yourself. I don't suggest that a client has to stop loving the parents or has to see them seldom. I mean take control of your own life, decisions, have your own space, make your own mistakes and not blame parents for them. I see it as opening the door to your true self.

#helpingothers #psychology #lifecoaching#lifecoach #london



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